A Day With a "Novice" Human

Today, my husband's daughter asked us to watch her child while she and her boyfriend went to a baseball game. It didn't seem like a bad idea. Haydin is darn cute. How much work could it be? “Sure” I gamely responded. Here are my thoughts since then.

I swear I chose right in not having kids.

If I'd have had them, they never would have lived. Four year olds are like puppies with thumbs and cleverer thoughts. They don't chew up feather pillows, but they do: spread kitty kibble all around your porch and swear it was the cat's tail that did it, notice a basket of vegetables you recently brought in from the garden and decide much joy can be had by squishing one of the tomatoes over all the other vegetables, decide it is great fun to pretend to be a dog and proceed to bite grandpa in the calf over and over, and take my collection of peacock feathers and proceed to either give them to Maya the puppy or dip them in water and sprinkle it across my school books. At one point she demanded we play hide and seek. She hid behind my chair. I said, "um, there you are." I did it wrong apparently.

"NO! You have to only look one way like crabby crab (from some cartoon I don't know about) and say 'Where is Haydin'. "

I said "but I can see you right there!"

“NNNNNOOOOOOOOO! You have to look one way and say where is Haydin!"

I obediently stared at the door and said “where is Haydin?”

There was no answer. I looked at the fish tank “Where is Haydin?” I tried again. I look down at her crouching behind my chair. “This is silly, I see you right there”

“NOOOOOO.... you have to pretend you don't see me”

And so I pretended to not see her. This gave her much pleasure. I remained completely confused.

Thankfully, or not, she discovered the bell on my side table and proceeded to ring it about the house endlessly. Earlier she had discovered the flashlight, which obviously brought her great joy, especially when she could shine it directly into my eyes.

It was a long day. It was a lovely day. It was a very unusual day for me. I spent it learning from a four year old. 

Thank you Haydin.